Local Bumperstickers part1

["Pop" Stran]

Jesus is coming, everyone look busy.
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A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
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Horn broken, watch for finger.
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The more you complain, the longer God lets you live.
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If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.
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Help wanted telepath: you know where to apply.
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I.R.S.: We've got what it takes to take what you've got.
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Jesus loves you... everyone else thinks you're an ass.
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Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.
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Hang up and drive.
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Lord save me from your followers.
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Guns don't kill people, postal workers do.