Post by "Pop" Stran on Jan 22, 2005 23:16:45 GMT -5
Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead...
Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow...
Do not walk beside me either...Just leave me the hell alone.
.....................
The journey of a thousand miles begins with a leaky tire and a broken fan belt.
.............
It's always darkest before dawn.
So if you're going to steal your neighbor's paper, that's the time to do it.
..........
It's a small world...so you gotta use your elbows a lot.
.....
SEX is like air: It's not important until you're not getting any.
.....
We are born naked, wet and hungry.
Then things get worse.
.......
No one is listening until you make a mistake.
.......
Always remember You are Unique.
just like everyone else.
......
Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
.......
It may be that your sole purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others.
.......
It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help.
.....
If you think no one cares if you're alive,
try missing a couple of car payments.
.....
If you tell the truth...
You don't have to remember anything.
.....
If you lend someone $20 and never see them again,
it was probably worth it.
.....
If you haven't much education,
You must use your brain.
.....
Never ruin an apology with an excuse.
.....
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
.....
If you drink, don't park.
Accidents cause people.
.....
Some days you're the bug,
Some days you're the windshield.
.....
If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
.....
Good judgement comes from bad experience...
and a lot of that comes from bad judgement.
.....
A closed mouth gathers no foot.
.....
Taxation WITH representation isn't so hot, either!
.....
Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day.
Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
.....
Don't Worry...
It only seems kinky the first time.
.....
I didn't say it was your fault...
I said I was going to blame you.
.....
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
.....
Eagles may soar...
but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
.....
There are two theories to arguing with women:
Neither one works.
.....
Generally speaking, You aren't learning much when your mouth is moving.
.....
If Barbie is so popular...
Why do you have to buy her friends?
.....
Anything worth taking seriously
is worth making fun of.
.....
Before you criticize someone,
you should walk a mile in their shoes.
Then when you criticize them,
you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
.....
Don't be irreplaceable.
If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
.....
Two wrongs don't make a right.
But three lefts do.
.....
How many of you believe in telekinesis?
Raise my hands.
.....
Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow...
Do not walk beside me either...Just leave me the hell alone.
.....................
The journey of a thousand miles begins with a leaky tire and a broken fan belt.
.............
It's always darkest before dawn.
So if you're going to steal your neighbor's paper, that's the time to do it.
..........
It's a small world...so you gotta use your elbows a lot.
.....
SEX is like air: It's not important until you're not getting any.
.....
We are born naked, wet and hungry.
Then things get worse.
.......
No one is listening until you make a mistake.
.......
Always remember You are Unique.
just like everyone else.
......
Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
.......
It may be that your sole purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others.
.......
It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help.
.....
If you think no one cares if you're alive,
try missing a couple of car payments.
.....
If you tell the truth...
You don't have to remember anything.
.....
If you lend someone $20 and never see them again,
it was probably worth it.
.....
If you haven't much education,
You must use your brain.
.....
Never ruin an apology with an excuse.
.....
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
.....
If you drink, don't park.
Accidents cause people.
.....
Some days you're the bug,
Some days you're the windshield.
.....
If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
.....
Good judgement comes from bad experience...
and a lot of that comes from bad judgement.
.....
A closed mouth gathers no foot.
.....
Taxation WITH representation isn't so hot, either!
.....
Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day.
Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
.....
Don't Worry...
It only seems kinky the first time.
.....
I didn't say it was your fault...
I said I was going to blame you.
.....
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
.....
Eagles may soar...
but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
.....
There are two theories to arguing with women:
Neither one works.
.....
Generally speaking, You aren't learning much when your mouth is moving.
.....
If Barbie is so popular...
Why do you have to buy her friends?
.....
Anything worth taking seriously
is worth making fun of.
.....
Before you criticize someone,
you should walk a mile in their shoes.
Then when you criticize them,
you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
.....
Don't be irreplaceable.
If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
.....
Two wrongs don't make a right.
But three lefts do.
.....
How many of you believe in telekinesis?
Raise my hands.
.....